I've been so behind lately. Not with my every day errands or work, but just with my blog writings and editing. Nobody has ever pressured me or anything like that, but it still bugs me to be "behind". I am not a procrastinator. I am a hardworking perfectionist who is absolutely obsessive about getting things done. I love being busy. I have a list of shorts, scenes, sketches, and photo shoots that I have already started piecing together. None of these self created projects have a deadline, but in my brain, they need to be completed NOW.
I love it, but I am exhausted and it's only January. Perhaps, its my own fault. I didn't quite take a break over the holidays. In fact, the holidays are one of the busiest times of the year in entertainment land. I filmed an episode of my web series, "12 TeEn", wrote a blog or two, had several dance shows, and of course my regular j.o.b.
One of the things I think a lot of people don't really realize, is that pursuing a career in the arts is essentially like taking on another full time job, only you are not getting paid for it. You should be working on your free career as much as possible so that one day, you will be getting paid for it. Many suggest spending at least an hour a day working towards your ideal career, whether it be taking a class, learning an accent, networking, branding, producing your own work, etc. Ever heard the saying, "it's not a sprint, it's a marathon"?
Well, let me tell you, I have been sprinting during this marathon and I am officially pooped. The problem is, it is so difficult for me to justify taking a break when I know time is passing me by and I am nowhere close to where I want to be. Well, I am getting there, but there is still a lot of work to put in. Am I the only one that feels like this? I understand that timing is everything, but it's just hard to sit back, and take a vacation, when you haven't had a single acting audition since November. Maybe even before that. And yes, I do submit myself EVERY day and several times throughout the day. How is this possible, I have no idea.
I know plenty of people who are fortunate enough to work very little their day job (parental assistance or they were awesome and booked that big national commercial) or who can regularly afford to go on vacations and see their families, but that is not me. I believe my motivation and determination will one day surpass and conquer. Right now, opportunities are not knocking at my door, so it's time for me to suck it up, and get back to my hustle. And let me tell you folks, my hustle is good. Really good. "Diva is a female version of a hustla" - Thanks Beyonce.
Remember a few blogs ago, I mentioned that my friend and I were talking about something, probably the business, my back or computer issues, and she said to me, "you are not a victim", well this is now something I have to tell myself on a regular basis. There is a path and plan for everyone. Hard work never disappears.
For now, I have to get ready for work. And I've already started season 2 of "12 TeEn". Enjoy.